Question from joyce psulson on 1/11/2008:
I was married 3 times. Two of them have passed away. I was divorced from the 1st and last marriage. The first husband is still alive(as far as I know). My question is :I was never married in the Church, is there anyway now that I have returned to the Church, to ever receive sacraments again????
Answer by David Gregson on 2/8/2008:
If I understand you correctly, your first husband is the only one still living, and you are not living with him. So if you are not now living with any man, there is no reason why you could not make a good confession and return to the sacraments.
To clarify, divorce in itself doesn't cut one off from the sacraments, but only divorce and remarriage. You are not now remarried, i.e., not living with a man the Church doesn't recognize as your husband. So you are in a position to repent of ever having done so, and receive sacramental absolution.
In marrying outside the Church, as a Catholic, you entered into an invalid marriage. You could probably have had your first marriage annulled for that reason, and been married validly the second time, but again you married outside the Church. And did so a third time. So what you need to repent of is 1) marrying outside the Church three times, 2) marrying a second and third husband without your prior marriages being annulled, 3) and living with men who were not really your husbands. These sins, of course, belong to a larger picture, including all sins that led up to and resulted from your being away from the Church.
You need to make an appointment with a priest for a general confession. To prepare for it, examine your life since your last confession and list all mortal sins and their frequency, as well as you can remember. What you don't remember won't count against you, so long as you intend to confess any sins you've forgotten at your next confession.
Meanwhile, give thanks to the Good Shepherd, who searched for you when you'd strayed, and brought you safely back home.
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