The personal and general judgement

The personal and general judgement
Question from Dan on 4/11/2008:

I am a converted catholic for 10 years, but only recently started to take my faith seriously. I pray the Rosary daily, read the bible daily, I acknowledge God as creator of everything, and I have Jesus as my Lord and Savior. I try to live my life according to Gods will and look at everyone as being Jesus. I know God's love, mercy, and forgiveness is far greater than any of my sins, but rather than trusting in his mercy and forgiveness, I key in on his judgement, because unlike anything else, when one dies there is no second chance at salvation, and eternity in hell and without the presence of God is an unthinkable fate. Instead of having peace and joy, I am sad, scared, and miserable.Please set my thinking straight.
Answer by David Gregson on 5/12/2008:

What may be missing in your spiritual life is a personal experience of God's love for you, you in particular. And the best place to look for this is in mental prayer. Mental prayer is more interior than ordinary (vocal) prayer. It may use words, but it doesn't rely on them. It focuses on God, rather than on ourselves (our needs, shortcomings, etc.). Its goal is to stir up one's love for God, based on our faith in Him.

There are many kinds of mental prayer, but since you already read your Bible, I suggest Lectio Divina (divine reading). For a simple introduction, go to Lectio Divina: What Is Lectio Divina. The website suggests a schedule of readings, based on the liturgical calendar. This may be helpful, but you're not bound to any schedule.

You may think of your time in prayer as listening for God's "still small voice." Or you may think of it as reaching out to God with your heart. Either way, if you persevere, you should feel God coming closer, and that's when your fears will be relieved.